That it’s a good thing that I’m only taking 12 hours this semester. More time to work at my work-study job, find some extra curriculars, and adjust to my new campus
That it’s okay to eat alone
That sometimes I have to be the one to initiate conversation and make friends on my own.
That it’s okay to be a loser for a little while
That sometime I have to harass people to get what I want.
That my english teacher might kick my ass. It’s English 102, lady, relax. I might actually really like it though. It’s about damn time someone made me write like I have the ability to, but was never pushed to produce anything worth while.
That I have the best boyfriend in the world to put up with, fix, and take me out for cheeseburgers after my legitimate meltdowns in the middle of campus.
That this ‘new kid at a big school’ bullshit is going to be really hard for a little while.
That I have to order my books early or else I’m not going to get them and get zeroes on the first assignments of the year.
I have zero friends yet so I’m still at the awkward ‘who am I going to eat with, I’d rather starve than eat alone’ stage- so I ate pretzels and applesauce alone.
Bastard boyfriend left me to fend for myself while he went to and had a great time at our friends party while I whined to him about how I was the biggest loser on the planet. I love him anyway though, he just wants me to find my own way.
I was really bored and couldn’t take sitting in my room by myself anymore so I went outside where I heard banjo music!! I had to investigate- and my lack of pride led me to the bluegrass band a few floors below me, so naturally I sat with them and listened to them play. Did they think I was a total loser for just showing up and listening to them (you should know, only one other weird kid did this)? Probably. Was it worth it? Absolutely.
Without anything else to do, I went to bed at 11. Only to wake up at 2:45 with the most intense UTI ever in the history of UTI’s. It was brutal. Zero sleep happened last night.
This morning I immediately made an appointment and ventured to Student Health, mind you- classes haven’t even started yet and I’m already peeing in cups- and got some meds.
I grabbed lunch with roommate, and since then I’ve been KO’d in my room trying to catch up on sleep.
I waited until tonight to pack all of my shit and move… file under poor decisions. I’ve reached the point of being so overwhelmed that I’m afraid to touch anything and just looking at the mess in my room/out in the hallway forces me to lay down and open the lappy. I really just need to throw some shit in some boxes and sort it out tomorrow when I have a new cute, clean room to play in.
On a brighter note, I got perscription Buddy Holly Ray-Ban glasses today. Call me trendy, but I’m just not ready for grown up glasses yet.
I’ve been internet-less for the past 5 days. It’s been a serious test of resilience. I’ve done really well though, all things considered. I still have my iPhone 3G to keep in touch, but it’s been a bit of struggle- tensions have been high in the Daniel household.
A bit of an update:
All of my DG sisters have moved into the DG house/back to Raleigh. It’s made me really sad to see all of the pictures and Twitter updates of their progress in Work Week and settling into the DG House. That combined with all of the drama surrounding the UNC Athletic Department has left me questioning my decision to leave. While I’m standing by the fact that it was the right decision and I will do better there- I still wish I had a sorority house to move into and an honorable football team/coach to stand by.
Shitty best friend and ex boyfriend are donezo… for good (I think). While I’ve heard these words before, something about her enthusiasm about being a single laday is making me confident in her ability to stay away and find someone new.
I met up with my future roommate today! She’s adorable and shockingly normal. She’s Indian- but not the kindof Indian that only associates with other Indians and downs curry like water. My hopes are high for this one- I think we’re going to get along beautifully while incorporating some brown into my life.
I move into my new home at UNC next Thursday. I’m really excited. New home, new friends, new classes, new news paper, new job (at the Chapel Hill art museum AHHH!!!) These are just a few of the things that reassure me that I made the right decision. 9 more days.
Currently I’m at Starbucks using their glorious internet at a strategically placed table perfectly angled to stare at the most beautiful Starbucks boy I’ve ever seen. (Sorry, boyfriend.)
That’s about it. I hope you guize had a marvelous week and are having a happy Tuesday. Cheers until tomorrow night when I am reconnected to the rest of the world by those bastards at Time Warner Cable who couldn’t fix it sooner.